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| the new shop is up and running for more than a week now...
get the url from me if u want...
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alrite... tis is gonna be the last entry... tis blog is dead for good... afterall, it has to end someday... today juz happens to be the dae... reason?... do we realli need a goddamn reason for everything?... 0hh well, im gonna miss tis place...ciao~ xanga... | | |
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im as chill-iest as can be, man...
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ive been holding it for awhile now... i dun even noe if i shld post tis entry... but screw it, it might juz help... if it doesnt, its juz gonna taint watever is alreadi black... afterall, tis is the place where i often came to seek solace, of sorts... 1 of the many ways i help myself, in a much less harmful way, to myself or others...
sometimes i wonder wat bad karma did i accumulate, to haf to go thru tis... even if i deserve shit, i thought i alreadi paid for dem?... in ways pple close to me would noe... karma u're a freaking bitch man, i detest u... the good ones never come, the bad ones stick to me...
i cant stop saying tis... but ive been freaking nice for the longest period i can remember... and even at a single point of time, i remember telling my close friends it actually felt good, to be nice... or at least, not be an ass...
too many times recently, i subconciously mumur to myself, "it doesnt pay to be nice"... or am i simply being nice to the wrong pple and stuffs?... maybe... i cant differentiate between those whu realli deserves it and those whu dun? those tat appreciate it and those tat dun give a shit? those whu need it and those whu take it for granted?... a big fat maybe...
shits... whu doesnt get dem?... its juz amazing YOU turn out to be the one giving me sleepless nights, endless headaches, painless sores, itchless rashes... ok wait, the last two made it sound like YOU gave me some STDs...
YOU muz be something huh?... i haven been upset tat badly for too long... but YOU did it... i noe YOU'll probably end up seeing tis... is it meant for your eyes?... maybe, maybe not... more importantly, im doing tis for myself...
"words are evil"... sometimes i say... dey realli are... apparently they are causing troubles now... its becoming increasingly more tough to get to YOU lately... usually wen pple make me go thru tis shit im going thru now, i can easily solve it... juz like wen pple keep wanting to walk into me, i wun stretch out my arms and resist dem, and ending up turning in circles wif dem juz to resist dem... instead, i walk away...
so wats so tough tis time?... y am i still standing there?... your words... but dun i alwaes haf an issue wif trusting pple?... shldnt tat makes it easy?... hmmmmmm... so maybe i do trust YOU afterall... maybe... trust, earn it and keep it...
someone told me b4... be nice to others, den u're not being nice to urself... to a certain extend, i realli do agree... so much for preaching to friends bout staying positive and happy, and lending dem a hand wen dey are down, and tat now im having difficulty applying dem to myself now... i feel like a pastor going ard town preaching to the delinquents against taking drugs, but ending up hiding in the confession box and taking drugs...
i realli do believe tat sometimes the right intentions can come out wrong... but den again, how much does tis differ frm giving excuses for shitting in your pants... not much diff to me... sometimes i hope i get excuses that deceive... ok great, wat did i juz ask for?... i juz asked for a huge pile of shit... amen, god bless me...
simple is good, good is green... hah... simplicity is complicating la... u're merely juz going thru more complex stuffs, juz to keep things simple... talk about irony, sheesh~...
sometimes i wish too, tat im still the dumb punk chompin' tits... being selfish realli makes 1 feel good... probably explains why YOU are like tat at times... im juz silly and dumb to be nice... but screw it, i am gonna be nice, even if it means driving pins thru my nails... afterall, '2005, be nice' was established last year, so im gonna keep it tat way... its simple wat, 'be nice', 2 short words... hah, the complex shits went thru juz to keep it as simple as tis... simplicity IS complicating huh?...
maybe YOU are right, im juz a volcano waiting to erupt... suits YOU den, its not a crime to be selfish... or wat YOU call it, being practical... juz like wat i would say to pple, "juz do wat u wanna do"... hah hah hah, sounds simple yet again... but behind tat its all the 'are u being true to urself', 'are u being selfish', etc etc... hah hah hah hah... simplicity realli realli realli realli is complicating...
i see... so maybe tat's why... ive been trying to be simple... instead im juz complicating stuffs... hmmmmmmmm....
AHHHHHHHH, SCREW IT LLLAAAAAAA~
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i haf pple telling me i should do tis...
so i shall... post... a... w-w-wish-l-l-l-l-list....
here it goes---->
an ipod video... (the muvo slim im having now realli sucks la)
boardpants, boardpants, more boardpants... (there's never enough boardpants)
$2374624 zara voucher... (let me shop till im happie can?)
sponsor my next tattoo/piercing?...
a new accoustic guitar... (the old 1 is like unplayable now)
that nice blue topman cap...
another pair of havaianas... (im starting to think the old 1 is fugly)
ahhhhhh~... its tough la, trying to pinpoint stuffs i want, material-wise... wat i realli want is freedom, truthfulness, green-ness, simplicity... can i get dem ??...
anyway, here's the lowdown on the top 7 carnivals/parties ever existed...
7)zoukout
6)womad
5)koh samui full moon party
4)loveparade
3)mardi gras
2)woodstock
andddddddddd...
1)haowanna night !! which is happening this sat!!
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